A Girl With A Broken Heart

Letting go of your heart to love someone is like gambling it for auction and selling it to the devil. A girl I knew very well got her heart broken so badly this time that she began to wonder what actually is her feelings. Was it love, angry, revenge, jealousy or just plain foolish. At the end of it she sums it up into feeling a feeling called numb. A pure feeling of numbness that she cry and laugh random times of the day.
When she first started off with this guy, she was so sure of the stars and earth. She told herself that she wouldn't fall for this young man who was just going to end up hurting her like the guys in the past. However the heart always choose to be a fool. She began spending too much time with the young man. While he was trying to mend his broken heart she became the cure and tool to do it. He treated her with full affection that everybody around them mistook their relationship for something more while all the time they were good friends.
As long as she told herself that this was just another heart making a fool decision because she was lonely, she was holding it up well. At least until one day when she was running after her friend, he called her name. She turned her head to face him. He told her not to run because if she ran she would fall. All she manage to do was make up faces and laugh at him and didn't realise that he would just smile and shook his head. That's when everything she was holding up fell into the wrong places. The feeling was there and for days she remain denying them in her heart. She started forcing herself to stop any contact with him but her heart won her over most of the time.
When she finally admits that she had feelings for him, the world came crushing down and took her along. She didn't even get to enjoy the moment when she realise that everything he had done was pure lies and fake actions. The thoughts and memories of him kills her as she replay the memory. Her tears came crumbling down as she collapse herself on the bed. The memories she kept playing in her head that used to give her hope and brought smiles to her face now brings tears and pierce her heart as if every one of it was a sharp knife stabbing her. The time he had given her the jacket when she was cold, when he placed her preferable drink in front of her, when he bought her the card holder because her's was ruined, when he pull her chair closer to him, when they spend hours talking, when he wore her gift and the "special" thing, when he held her cold feet just to warm it up, when he touched her face, when he place the place his cap on her, when he fed her the cheesecake, and so many more memories. Every memory kills her worst than what she had experience.
She later on found out the lies he told her. He was not truly honest in his words and that she was just a tool. He had told her that he would not be with another person till he seeks something in life that he was searching for. That was a few days ago and now his in a relationship with another girl which he had never talk about with her. She felt stupid in her own world of hope and she swore to never believe man's words.